Do men and women really have a different approach to money? We talked to 5 couples across different age groups and different stages in their lives to find out.
Researchers at UCLA School of Nursing found that men and women are wired differently while another study found that males have better motor abilities whereas females have better memory and social cognition skills. Okay, so the gender’s brains are wired differently. But the question is, does one gender manage money better? Here are insights from the 5 couples we talked to on money management and how they overcome their different financial views for a lasting relationship.
Ismail and Atikah, both mid 20’s, engaged
Tell us your philosophy when it comes to managing money. What do you believe in?
I believe in saving in order to secure yourself and your family financially in the future.
I believe in saving in order to secure yourself and your family financially in the future.
How important is saving money to you, and why?
It is important to secure enough savings for investments and also for future children’s education.
It is important to secure enough savings for investments and also for future children’s education.
Do you have conflicting views of how you manage your money? How do you overcome them?
Not really, but we try to balance it out and remind each other to not spend on the unnecessary.
Not really, but we try to balance it out and remind each other to not spend on the unnecessary.
Before you married/while you’re dating, did you share your financial situation (debts and all) in complete honesty?
Yes and no. There are things that we share but I’d rather leave the petty ones out in order to maintain a healthy relationship.
Yes and no. There are things that we share but I’d rather leave the petty ones out in order to maintain a healthy relationship.
Who do you think is better at managing money?
My other half (Ismail) as he is better about this matter.
My other half (Ismail) as he is better about this matter.
Zakri and Anisha, both mid 20’s, just married
Tell us your philosophy when it comes to managing money. What do you believe in?
My philosophy would be to never spend money which you don’t have.
My philosophy would be to never spend money which you don’t have.
How important is saving money to you, and why?
Saving is really important to me, I’m very sure it is to everyone. It is very important to feel secured financially as we do not know what is coming our way in future. But managing your savings is not easy. One needs to at least learn and gain saving knowledge. Know the importance of saving, it would be much easier.
Saving is really important to me, I’m very sure it is to everyone. It is very important to feel secured financially as we do not know what is coming our way in future. But managing your savings is not easy. One needs to at least learn and gain saving knowledge. Know the importance of saving, it would be much easier.
Do you have conflicting views of how you manage your money? How do you overcome them?
Fortunately both of us are on the same boat when managing our money. It makes it easier when our partner have the same financial views. However there are also times that we don’t agree on the same thing. That is when we will sit down and discuss on what’s right and wrong.
Fortunately both of us are on the same boat when managing our money. It makes it easier when our partner have the same financial views. However there are also times that we don’t agree on the same thing. That is when we will sit down and discuss on what’s right and wrong.
Before you married/while you’re dating, did you share your financial situation (debts and all) in complete honesty?
Yes. He knows my financial situation and I know his financial situation very well as we always share about it. We even know each other’s ATM pin number and also online banking password.
Yes. He knows my financial situation and I know his financial situation very well as we always share about it. We even know each other’s ATM pin number and also online banking password.
Who do you think is better at managing money?
My husband is way better at managing money. This is because he is the type who would save and who would think about the future (financially). Sometimes I spend money without thinking(impulse buying).
My husband is way better at managing money. This is because he is the type who would save and who would think about the future (financially). Sometimes I spend money without thinking(impulse buying).
What’s the key to a successful financially stable marriage/relationship in your opinion?
Both must try to be on the same page on financial views, I know it is not easy but try to understand each other’s financial views. If there’s any disagreement, sit down and talk about it and discuss. This is because sometimes one is not in the right state of mind to think properly due to stress.
Both must try to be on the same page on financial views, I know it is not easy but try to understand each other’s financial views. If there’s any disagreement, sit down and talk about it and discuss. This is because sometimes one is not in the right state of mind to think properly due to stress.
Khairul and Afiqah, both mid 20’s, married with 1 child
Can you share some of your rules when managing your household budget?
Our rules when it comes to household budget is to only spend money to buy things that are necessary, spend money according to my affordability and that remaining money after paying off loan and purchase of necessities goes to savings.
Our rules when it comes to household budget is to only spend money to buy things that are necessary, spend money according to my affordability and that remaining money after paying off loan and purchase of necessities goes to savings.
How important is saving money to you, and why?
It’s very important because it serves as emergency fund as well as savings for the future.
It’s very important because it serves as emergency fund as well as savings for the future.
Do you have conflicting views of how you manage your money? How do you overcome them?
Yes. We overcome the difference in views by discussing the rationale and logic for the best method, most often reaching conclusion after small arguments over each other’s views.
Yes. We overcome the difference in views by discussing the rationale and logic for the best method, most often reaching conclusion after small arguments over each other’s views.
Who do you think is better at managing money?
I think wives are better at managing money. They constantly worry even about the future, even event which are yet to occur.
I think wives are better at managing money. They constantly worry even about the future, even event which are yet to occur.
Couple A: both in 30’s, married with 1 child
Can you share some of your rules when managing your household budget?The main rule we go by is never hold any outstanding bills. Every month we put money aside to settle ALL the bills. After money for bills and savings are set aside, whatever is left is our disposable cash, in this way we can relax a bit and lighten that lingering weight over our heads.
How important is saving money to you, and why?
For me and my wife, it’s pretty important. We are risk averse people. So we do keep cash aside for emergencies. However, after having our son, it’s not as much as we used to save. But because we already had a nest egg, there is enough there to cover most emergencies and of course pay for holidays (that’s kind of important). Anyways, my properties are a type of savings, not as liquefiable but it’s something.
For me and my wife, it’s pretty important. We are risk averse people. So we do keep cash aside for emergencies. However, after having our son, it’s not as much as we used to save. But because we already had a nest egg, there is enough there to cover most emergencies and of course pay for holidays (that’s kind of important). Anyways, my properties are a type of savings, not as liquefiable but it’s something.
Do you have conflicting views of how you manage your money? How do you overcome them?
Yes, but normally we just talk it out. If it turns out to be a want and also is somewhat of a need then normally its fine. If not, we just put it off until we have some extra money and then figure it out from there.
Yes, but normally we just talk it out. If it turns out to be a want and also is somewhat of a need then normally its fine. If not, we just put it off until we have some extra money and then figure it out from there.
Before you married or while you’re dating, did you share your financial situation (debts and all) in complete honesty?
Sort of. If we questioned each other, we would each give honest answers. But it’s not like we’d blurt out “I have a student loan! I have a home loan!” But we knew each other’s salaries and would sort of keep each other in check from impulse buying a lot of nonsense.
Sort of. If we questioned each other, we would each give honest answers. But it’s not like we’d blurt out “I have a student loan! I have a home loan!” But we knew each other’s salaries and would sort of keep each other in check from impulse buying a lot of nonsense.
Who do you think is better at managing money?
I guess my wife is better at it as she’s more cautious, so she takes the initiative to sit us down, talk about our expenses and all those things. I’m better at numbers, so we have this whole excel thing I mapped out so we can manage ourselves better.
I guess my wife is better at it as she’s more cautious, so she takes the initiative to sit us down, talk about our expenses and all those things. I’m better at numbers, so we have this whole excel thing I mapped out so we can manage ourselves better.
What advice would you give newly married couples?
For to-be married couples, I will say don’t waste money on a lavish wedding. It’s a day or two in your life and you will probably be too busy to enjoy it. Put that money into a nice home which you will be spending your time together in. For newly married couples, although it’s fun to live in the present, also think about where you want to be in the future.
For to-be married couples, I will say don’t waste money on a lavish wedding. It’s a day or two in your life and you will probably be too busy to enjoy it. Put that money into a nice home which you will be spending your time together in. For newly married couples, although it’s fun to live in the present, also think about where you want to be in the future.
Couple B: both in 30’s, married with 3 children
W= wife
H= husband
H= husband
Tell us your philosophy when it comes to managing money. What do you believe in?
W: I believe when it comes to income it’s not how much you earn but what you do with it or how you manage it that matters. If you earn a lot but spend it all in a month then it’s not better than earning a lot less but saving most of it. It’s really important to understand delayed gratification and making money work for you.
W: I believe when it comes to income it’s not how much you earn but what you do with it or how you manage it that matters. If you earn a lot but spend it all in a month then it’s not better than earning a lot less but saving most of it. It’s really important to understand delayed gratification and making money work for you.
H: What she said.
Can you share some of your rules when managing your household budget?
W: We use the envelope system where we have different categories of expenses like groceries, eating out, etc. And we set aside money monthly in each envelope for that expense. The rest is saved or invested. If there’s no money left in the envelope say for restaurants than we don’t eat out.
W: We use the envelope system where we have different categories of expenses like groceries, eating out, etc. And we set aside money monthly in each envelope for that expense. The rest is saved or invested. If there’s no money left in the envelope say for restaurants than we don’t eat out.
How important is saving money to you, and why?
W: It’s super important but should also be balanced. Living frugally is natural to me and I want my money to last especially as I’m unemployed. We have to think of our children’s needs and education as well as the future.
H: Important for a rainy day and also for our children’s school fees.
W: It’s super important but should also be balanced. Living frugally is natural to me and I want my money to last especially as I’m unemployed. We have to think of our children’s needs and education as well as the future.
H: Important for a rainy day and also for our children’s school fees.
Do you have conflicting views of how you manage your money? How do you overcome them?
No. we are on the same page when it comes to money management. And we make important money decisions together.
No. we are on the same page when it comes to money management. And we make important money decisions together.
Who do you think is better at managing money?
Both are good at it. Both believe in delayed gratification and support each other towards that goal.
Note: couple A and B choose to remain anonymous
Both are good at it. Both believe in delayed gratification and support each other towards that goal.
Note: couple A and B choose to remain anonymous
What’s the key to a successful financially stable marriage in your opinion?
Be honest with each other and trust each other. Cooperate and hash things out if you don’t agree. There’s got to be some compromise. For example, when deciding on buying a car, talk about pros and cons
Be honest with each other and trust each other. Cooperate and hash things out if you don’t agree. There’s got to be some compromise. For example, when deciding on buying a car, talk about pros and cons
The couples we talked to also shared their financial priorities and their main financial worries:
| Top Financial Priorities | Top Financial Worries |
| Financial independence | Debt |
| Savings | Cost of living |
| Retirement | Not having enough for retirement |
“ These days, when we give out budget forms during our program and tell couples to fill it up together, the wives will take the budget form and fill it out. So now it’s changing, it’s the wives that is doing all the planning.” Nor Akmar Yaakub, Head of Financial Education, Credit Counselling and Debt Management Agency (AKPK)
So Who Is Better With Money?
We found that all of the couples we talked to discuss money management with their partner. If any financial conflicts arise they resolve it together. Most couples also ranked savings as very important.
Interestingly, 2 out the 5 couples stated that wives are better at managing money, while 2 couples said their male partner is better with money. So there’s no clear line as to who manage money better from our findings, although our sample is limited. But what we can gather is that when both genders combine their strength, it can help to improve a couple’s financial situation.
“It makes it easier when our partner have the same financial views.” – Anisha
But even if you don’t share the same views on money with your partner, all is not lost. As the study mentioned earlier have showed, men and women are wired differently so differences of view is not surprising. What’s important is to come to a decision together.
“We overcome the difference in [financial] views by discussing the rationale and logic for the best method” – Afiqah
Source
No comments:
Post a Comment